Thursday, October 15, 2009

This Kid Just Peaked at Nine

OK, this goal pretty much rules:



There are a thousand things to like about this, not the least of which is how awesome the goal itself really was.

  1. That really is one awesome goal. So awesome, in fact, that I sort of worry that this kid may have peaked in Pee Wee Hockey. I don't want him angrily watching this video over and over when he's 40, eating a Hungry Man dinner while getting ready to go to work at the town dump, and then re-telling the tale to the guy at the dump who doesn't even speak English and is still sick of the story. Just saying: Get cracking on that homework, kid.
  2. The woman who shrieks at the end of the goal. It's a weird combination of Hockey Mom and Woo Girl. It's hard to say she was too excited, since this was such a spectacular goal, but I hope that she's just as amped up when the kid comes home with a B+. He'll need all the help he can get to make sure this wasn't life's high point for him.
  3. The goalie's reaction, which was to do nothing during the skater's whirling dervish routine, look back in astonishment at the puck in the net, look at the referee to demand that he rule the play illegal, because, c'mon, who does that, and then to throw his hands up in the universal "WTF?" gesture. He's waking up this morning only to find out that his failure is the newest Internet viral video. He will be mocked mercilessly by his friends today, and he will testily reply by making up a rule that invalidates the goal. He's not allowed to carry the puck like that! Even if he becomes the biggest banker in Maine, he'll still feel the sting every time he goes to the town dump and sees the Hero of the Portland Junior Pirates there, because he knows the dude will find a way to mention the goal. Again. The only way this becomes worse for the goalie is if the Woo Girl is actually his mother.

Wednesday, August 26, 2009

Wednesday, July 29, 2009

Shatner Does Palin

She may be a quitter, but she's America's pre-eminent Surrealist poet:

Saturday, July 11, 2009

Fund Our Zoo or We'll Shoot this Giraffe!

The Franklin Park Zoo says it will have to close if it Governor Patrick doesn't reverse the budget cuts to the facility. Not only will it have to close, they say, but they will have to kill the animals in the zoo to do so.

This has to be an empty threat. There's no way they shoot the animals in some odd public execution. Maybe they are angling to get more private donations in, or a partial restoration of state funds. Quick math tells me that they could also raise ticket prices by $7-$10 to cover the losses (you have to figure lower attendance when you raise the fees, which is why I put a spread in there.

Where would they get such an idea to try and scare the public to raise state funds? Two places. The MBTA. And the movie Fierce Creatures:

Friday, July 10, 2009

All the News That's Fit To Tune

As always, I am the last to an Internet meme party, but I had to share Auto-Tune the News:



Just read about it in Slate, which means the meme is just about dead, but whatever, it's hilarious. Absolutely brilliant.

Thursday, June 25, 2009

Follow my Jeopardy! tryout trip on Twitter

OK, all, I am about to leave for my Jeopardy! tryout in New York. Wish me luck.

I will try to tweet the trip, so stay tuned to my twitter feed for any breaking news.

EXCLUSIVE: Hidden Camera Footage of Mark Sanford

Here is what can only be hidden footage of Mark Sanford and a reporter from The State as he returned from his break-up trip to Argentina:


Wednesday, June 17, 2009

More Evidence That Obama's a Badass

This video:



...proves that President Obama trained under Mr. Miyagi:

Friday, May 29, 2009

Where I've been

I was trapped by marauding caterpillars:


OK, that's not me. That's some car in Germany.

Egad, it's been a long time. Sorry for the yawning gap between posts. I have been absolutely crushed at work, and hen spending most nights studying for the Jeopardy audition. Poor excuses, I know, so I will try to pick up the pace again.

Friday, May 08, 2009

Hooray for me: I'm One Step Closer to Losing on Jeopardy!

I got an e-mail last night from Jeopardy! and they want me to come to a follow-up audition!

This was my third year taking the online exam. I knew that I spit the bit both times the first two years, but I was very confident this time around.

The follow-up in in New York next month. Wish me luck! I don't care if I blow the game as bad as Cliff did, it's thrilling just to go through the process.

Wednesday, May 06, 2009

RIP Dom DeLuise



He was the first comedian I ever noticed and laughed at as a kid. His winking style of slapstick worked on so many levels. Rest in peace, big guy.

Tuesday, May 05, 2009

Where Will Lycanthropy Happen This Year?



This had to be from a a Bill Simmons fan. Brilliant.

(h/t: My buddy Jason)

Wednesday, April 29, 2009

Olympia Snowe, you're next

Slate has a really interesting take on why Olympia Snowe should follow Arlen Specter's lead and jump to the Democratic party. Using a social-Web-style cluster map where Senators are connected if they vote together 65% of the time, it's clear she's pretty much a Democrat already:



Slate didn't add an embed code to this animated map (which is really annoying because they're usually more Web-friendly, being a Web-only magazine and all) so I took a screen capture while mousing over Snowe's dot. As you can see, she's tied to far more Democrats than Republicans already. She's the mirror image of Ben Nelson, the center-right Democrat from Nebraska.

Hell, by this measure, Susan Collins (the the left and slightly below Snowe's dot) is the only true independent left in the Senate. Specter was far more right-leaning than her, but made the jump because of political circumstance. But if you think back to the amount of shit Specter, Snowe and Collins took for supporting the stimulus bill, you can see why they are gravitating away from the Republican Party. This was all only a matter of time.

TPM's "Day in 100 Seconds" video gives you a good look at the reaction from both sides. Please note the Fiddling While Rome is Burning attitude of Michael Steele, who is RNC chair, and thus, in charge of making sure his party grows its electoral clout, not piss it away:

Monday, April 27, 2009

Fun Fact Monday: The Milky Way Tastes Like Raspberries



God love the scientists who figured this one out.

(h/t to Wait Wait...Don't Tell Me for bringing this up during his week's show)

Thursday, April 23, 2009

Scream F--k If You Love America!

Shep Smith goes ballistic listening to some yahoo try to defend torture as an effective means for the CIA:



Don't "Oops" yourself, Shep. It's good to finally see someone show that level of disgust about the CIA's torturing suspects. It should make everyone furious. I sometimes think Shepard needs to be rescued from Fox News, but I'm glad he's there to every once in a while blurt out some truth on the air.

(h/t: Ta-Nehisi Coates)

Wednesday, April 22, 2009

Monday, April 20, 2009

Is This a Slugger Which I See Before Me?



(h/t: my pal Jascha)

UPDATE: As it is Patriot's Day, I would be remiss to have a baseball post and not include the greatest Patriot's Day video clip of all time, The "Here Comes a Pizza!" incident of 2007:

Friday, April 17, 2009

Let's Save the Globe!


Dan Kennedy has consistently has some of the most cogent, thoughtful ideas about how to find a new model for newspapers to survive in the Internet age. I strongly recommend anyone interested in the topic go back and read his different pieces on the topic. Hopefully, he'll take my advice and put together an eBook about it.

In his latest post, he advocated the Boston Globe give away Amazon Kindles in return for a three-year subscription, and then stop producing a paper version altogether. I think it's a great, forward-looking premise, but there are some details that maybe should change to make sure this is a working model for the future.
I wrote on his blog:

1. The Kindle is crippled with Amazon's DRM. And the company seems willing to mess with your Kindle if it whenever it wants. The Globe should be careful not to make an exclusivity deal with Amazon, or
2. Skip the Kindle altogether and wait for Plastic Logic's device to come out. It looks to be far superior a device to the Kindle, has a bigger screen and, most importantly, is open source. I think newspaper readers would really prefer the screen real estate Plastic Logic is promising.
Open Source really is key here, because it guarantee's the Globe's content is not a slave to Amazon's device or its business practices. Plus, PL says a second generation device will be foldable, making it even more portable.
3. Consider a paid iPhone app that offers better readability and multi-touch tools than the online version. The idea is to charge for added portability and convenience, so why not try this across several platforms? Palm's coming out with an iPhone competitor, too, so make an app for that. And for Google's Android mobile OS, etc.
In short, what you'd be charging for is not the content, but the enhanced access to that content, and charging advertisers for access to subscribers willing to pay money for what they want. That mirrors the old system of paying for newspapers where consumers paid for subscriptions for access to the content, and advertisers bought ad space for access to those consumers.

I have other ideas for how papers in general (and the Globe in particular) can try to enhance revenue as they transition to a digital-only existence:

1. Grow the social aspects of your sites. Boston.com's new commenting system allows users to create profiles, add avatars, and track other people's comments, show a history of their commetns, and more. This is a great idea. If you create a social web and foster a community on your pages, people will return to boston.com for their news, instead of relying on RSS feeds and Google news. It gives readers a compelling reason to return and view more pages (and thus, view more ads). It also gives you a chance to more directly target ads to users, which should generate more revenue and a higher asking proce for those ads.

2. Get comfortable linking elsewhere, and being linked from elsewhere. Now that you've created a social element to boston.com, make it compatible with facebook, myspace and other social Web sites. I can't tell you how many people link to news stories on their Facebook accounts: Allow users to link what they comment to their facebook account, and make it possible to do so in a single step. Same thing for friendfeed, myspace, digg, reddit, and anything else you can think of.

3. Promote Web specials like blog posts, videos and the like with the same prominence as your news articles. The Globe has hidden away some great features like Globe 10.0 and Take 2 in the bowels of sub pages for sections of the paper. Boston.com should have a videos, articles, blog posts and a twitter feed on the front page. The videos create drawing power and interest. The articles provide authoritative news. The blogs provide up to date opinion and developing news. The tweets provide up-to-the-moment updates. NECN.com is a good example of how this might look.

4. Find ways to sell premiums: Your content should be free online, but that doesn't mean it can't make revenue for you in other ways. Make yearbooks for the sports teams, which can include all your coverage for that year. Pitch them to customers as a yearly purchase for their kids as they grow up into big Sox fans. Do the same for election coverage, major issues (like Big Dig coverage), etc. Host live events with your reporters, columnists and staff. Each year, This American Life sells tickets for a live broadcast of their show. I and thousands of others across the country pay $20 to listen to something I get for free every week via podcast and on the radio.

If you enhance your Web site, you can charge more for advertising there. If you create premium access points via eReaders, Mobile phone platforms and the like, you create a new subscriber base. Piecing these things together puts you where your readers now go and makes you relevant again. Don't be afraid to fail, and don't ever, EVER eschew new technology as a fad again.

Wednesday, April 15, 2009

And Jumpsuits For All


Other headlines I considered for this post:
Creeping Debt
Master of Pantsuits
Enter Sandals Man
Fade to Is the New Black
Leopard-print Messiah

(h/t: My friends Danielle and Ty, who found it as a twitpic, but the original has disappeared)

Monday, April 13, 2009

"It was definitely a piece of work"



It has to be a joke, right? If it's not, then the model (Divine Dutchess, in what will surely be her breakthrough role as "Skank pressed against the Hancock Tower") delivers one of the all-time great non-compliments at the 2:44 mark. 

Friday, April 10, 2009

Berto-Approved This Week

  • My beloved and hated city of Revere is going to start buying abandoned properties, fix them up, and sell them to first-time home buyers. In essence, the city is tired out banks that foreclose on properties and then lets them rot like a tomato in the Sun. It's far better to use a non-profit agency to buy the depressed space, put a little money into it, and then sell it, hopefully at a modest profit. It's a smart move that addresses the housing and financial crisis all at the same time. I've said it before about Mayor Ambrosino, but it's nice to have a guy in office who actually cares about the city and not his own pocket.



  • Boston's trying to set up a bike share program like the one they have in Paris. It's a great idea, and shouldn't cost the city any money. So of course, Brett, the Universal Hub crank, hates the idea, and gets spanked pretty hard in the comments. heh.



  • There's this flower called Duckweed, and it apparently grows all over the world. It can survive in wastewater, and has five to six times the starch as corn. And scientists have figured out you can turn it into ethanol with the same process farms all across America use for corn ethanol. So, same process, same legacy costs, but five to six times the energy, which makes it way more cost effective! Hooray Duckweed!

Wednesday, April 01, 2009

Stuck In My Head: Les Savy Fav

Les Savy Fav have been dominating my iPod lately. Let's Stay Friends has officially made it to the list of albums that consistently resurface for extended play every few months*



This video sort of sums up everything a love and hate about hipsters. The forced quirkiness, the intentional nonchalance, the meticulous dishevelment. All that is lame and makes me nuts. But the music kicks ass, the girl is oddly cute, and the whole thing comes together and is pretty awesome.

*Who else is on that list? Descendents' Somery, Cake's Fashion Nugget, Neil Young's Live in Massey Hall, 1971, Elliot Smith's Either/Or, Radiohead's In Rainbows and OK Computer, The Clash's London Calling, Hole's Live Through This, Nirvana's Unplugged in New York, and a few others. And we're talking about years and years. I've had some of these albums for well over 15 years, and still go back to them.

Tuesday, March 31, 2009

Really? Long Wharf, too?



OK, I don't live in Boston, and God knows Revere has its own problems to deal with, but the idea of privatizing Long Wharf really pisses me off. Hopefully some sanity and involved neighbors will win the day and save the space.

The space works so well precisely because it's a quiet spot on an otherwise bustling waterfront. That's not to say no one ever goes there; on the contrary, there are usually a score of people milling about along the wharf or sitting on the massive granite slabs, leaning against the thick black chains, looking down at the water and talking with whoever is there with them.

And they are talking quietly. Because you can talk quietly at Long Wharf. You can sit and chat like adults. Or you can sit silently and watch the boats coming in and out of the nearby piers. Or the planes taking off and landing across the way at Logan. Or hear the faint sound of music coming from the Bank of America Pavilion (nee FletBoston Pavilion, nee Harborlights). It's one of the most mellow spots in Boston, and can really calm your nerves after a busy day.

At what point exactly did we decide that the urban oasis is no longer necessary? Why must every space be programmed to death? The space is well designed, quiet, and put to good use by residents and visitors alike. What exactly is the BRA trying to fix by adding a restaurant to the site?

Oh, and by the way, Chart House is a restaurant that's already on Long Wharf. And Tia's, Sel de la Terre, and Legal Sea Foods are at less than a block away. The North End and its dozens and dozens of eateries are about a quarter-mile away. Faneuil Hall is across the street, for chrissakes, as are the pubs and restaurants on State Street. How many more places do we need to eat in this square mile of city?

(h/t: Universal Hub and Kevin McCrea)

Tuesday, March 24, 2009

Wall Street Pulled Off the Lufthansa Heist

They made a movie to help explain Treasury Secretary Tim Geithner's plan to save the banks! Why do what worked in Sweden and most other failing bank systems when you can just back up the trucks and load up the cash?


Starring:
Robert DeNiro as Tim Geithner
Johnny Roast Beef as AIG, and his wife's pink Cadillac as his retention bonus
Frankie Carbone as Merrill Lynch, and his wife's fur coat as his performance bonus
Ray Liotta as Citibank
Joe Pesci as Rahm Emanuel
Morrie the Wig Man as GM
Lufthansa Airlines as the American taxpayer

Thursday, March 19, 2009

Someone in This Picture Hates the Leaning Tower of Pisa

Can you guess who it is?




Of course, this is not to be confused with hating Prince House of Pizza on Route 1. Because nobody hates Prince House of Pizza.



Tuesday, March 17, 2009

Give It Up For the Geeks at MIT

Them kids don't quit. Check this out:



The professor keeps comparing the tech to Minority Report, but it's actually cooler than that: What they presented doesn't require screens at all, unlike the gesture-based UI in the movie:

Thursday, March 12, 2009

That F***ing Superman Guy

Lex Luthor needs a bailout. I think you may know why:

Tuesday, March 10, 2009

Why's It Always Revere?

I was reading Universal Hub tonight, and I saw this headline:

Big Beef at Kelly's

First, I thought, "Shit, what happened at Kelly's? Dammit, why does dumb shit always happen in Revere?"

Then I read Adam's post, which makes clear that this was the Kelly's in Medford, and i thought "Alright, dodged a bullet. Go Medford thugs!"

Next, I went to read the actual article at Wicked Local Medford, and it's this hilarious (because it wasn't me) story about some guys hitting on the drive-thru window girl and her boyfriend and his pals taking offense. Oh, and beating the flirty guy with sticks. And I think "Wow, thank God this wasn't in Revere. I'd never hear the end of it from my friends."

Finally, I read the final graf of the story:

The men described the original suspect, who was later identified as Ilir Sinaj, 23, of 139 Sigourney St., Revere. He was arrested and charged with three counts of assault and battery with a dangerous weapon.

And I thought, "Dammit, dammit dammit!"

Next Stop: Rejection

A friend of mine, a dashing young lady who lives and works in Boston, was heading to work on the Green Line this morning when a lad decided to chat her up. She decided to turn his efforts into a teaching moment. Here’s what happened, in her own words:
Comely Friend of Under The Sink: I was on the T and a young dude in a suit was like, "What do your tattoos mean?"
11:35 AM
So I explained: Mother and father, and he asked, “Why in Arabic?” So I told him I was part Lebanese and he made some comment of how he cannot tan and he is not as golden as me, even in summer.
11:36 AM
So I laughed, and he was like, “Where do you work?” I told him, and he just went “Ah, [place where she works],” and asked if I did SQL work at all
11:37 AM
So I said yes, and he asked where I was from. And I said "I have a boyfriend, you know," and he was like, “Where's your ring?!”
11:38 AM

Under The Sink: He asked if you did SQL work???
Is he a stalker or did you have a SQL book out or something?

Comely Friend of Under The Sink: …and I laughed and said, “No ring!” And he laughed and said, "I wouldn't have started talking to you if you had one!" LOL
11:39 AM
[About the SQL stuff] No, he asked more about the database work I do.
11:40 AM
So he asked, “How'd you meet your bf, and I explained and mentioned [Boyfriend of Comely Friend of Under The Sink] was younger because we were talking about school, and he's like, “Whoa! I thought you were 25,” and then he said, “Wait how did your bf score a girl like you!?” And I said, "See what you're doing there, any girl would like to hear a compliment like that! That's nice."
11:41 AM
"You make good conversation. Focus on that, but don't come on too strong."

Under The Sink: LOLOL
11:42 AM

Comely Friend of Under The Sink: And I mentioned, "It's nice that you asked about work and stuff instead of just making fluffy convo!"
  And I said, "And you gotta ask right away if a girl has a boyfriend. Don't set yourself up for false advertising."
11:43 AM Then he was like, "Do you have any single friends like you!?!??"
  and I said no, sorry, but keep talking to girls on the T!
  It was a nice conversation!
So there you have it, a good-looking woman tells you what to do when flirting on the T:
  1. You have a small window of time when flirting on the T. Make the time count!
  2. Pay the lady a compliment!
  3. Avoid fluffy conversation that doesn’t mean anything to anyone.
  4. Ask her about work!
  5. Ask if she has a boyfriend!
  6. Don’t come on too strong!

Who knew there were this many rules?

The whole thing was eerily like making a cold call in sales. Our Comely Friend is like Giovanni Ribisi in Boiler Room:

In Defense of Rush

A Salon Blogger gives an excellent defense of Rush against the hordes mounting against him. Perhaps we have been too rash...

(h/t: James)

Thursday, March 05, 2009

Pwned!

OK, this is the last time Rick Santelli comes up around here, but I had to post this: Jon Stewart destroys the clown in eight short minutes:

Monday, March 02, 2009

Stuck in My Head: Don't Tell Me You Love Me (Really)



OK, this is stuck in my had in the literal sense: It's been rattling up there all morning. I was never a huge Night Ranger fan, although I do love "Sister Christian" like all 80's metalheads and Boogie Nights fans should.*

Anyway, the video is filled with unintentional comedy, so it's worth a gander. There's also a legitimately cool trick with a balloon, birthday cake, and slo-mo camera during the guitar solo on the old timey train. That's some music video magic.

*A big "Fuck You" to Universal group for disabling the embedding feature for their YouTube videos. MtvMusic didn't have the Sister Christian video, and I can't embed it here because Universal is a-scared of the Interwebz.

UPDATE: Here's the Sister Christian scene from Boogie Nights. I include it because 1) It rules, 2) Fuck You, Universal. Fair Use is a bitch, and 3) There's bonus Rick Springfield!

Friday, February 27, 2009

Rick Santelli: Runt Bitch

You know things are tough when Matt Lauer of all people takes you down, hard, on national television. Rick Santelli called millions of people facing homlessness "losers," but apparently is afraid Obama Press Secretary Robert Gibbs is going to break his legs or something. Please.





Let this be a lesson to everyone: Don't be this guy.

(h/t: Ta-Nahishi Coates, who is a must-read for anyone interested in the crossroads between culture and politics)

Thursday, February 26, 2009

Teh Internetz has Spoken

Bobby Jindal is Kenneth the Page:



(h/t: debateporridge, via Dailykos)

Tuesday, February 24, 2009

It's Not Your Fault, Rick Santelli. It's Not Your Fault.

Matt Yglesias nails the fundamental issue in the housing crisis:

When someone applies for a mortgage, there are two parties to the transaction. On one side of it is a teacher or a blogger or an electrician or a lawyer or a nurse or a guy who manages a Home Depot. On the side is a guy who, for a living, as a professional, works in the “deciding on what terms to offer people mortgages” business who works, for a living, at a financial services business.

Be sure to read Matt's entire post. The Rick Santelli revolt is based in such bullshit. The idea that home buyers were the principal bad actors in this crisis makes zero sense for the reason outlined above. If I go to buy a house, and the person who's lending me the money says I can afford it, and that even if it's tight, not to worry because, in his professional opinion, the home value will definitely go up, and I base my purchase on that professional advice, how is this my fault? The alternative is to have everyone major in economics before purchasing a house.

The answer, of course, is that the brokerage firms knew they were going to sell off the mortgages they signed, so the impetus to avoid unnecessary risk just wasn't there. To blame people who reasonably believed no one would lend them money if they couldn't afford it is designed to kick up enough dirt and sand so the real culprits can sneak away.

What Rick Santelli and the rest of the thieves who created this mess want is for you to subsidize them, their banks, their companies instead of the "loser mortgages." Watching that clip of him whipping up the Chicago Exchange traders was like watching Knute Rockne give Murder Inc. a pep talk. Just total garbage.

But maybe I'm just being mean, and what Rick Santelli needs is a good, long hug and pat on the back. Because who wouldn't want the Good WIll Hunting treatment:



(h/t Pete for the Matt Y link)

Friday, February 20, 2009

It's Like Ed Grimley and the Superfans Had a Baby

Via Adam Gaffin, via Adam Pieniazek, now comes a challenger for Gino's crown: A young turk named Jeremy Fry, who goes completely apeshit during "Livin on a Prayer."



Celtics Fandome has the feed from the jumbotron, although Adam P's version, above, is more enjoyable because the New Garden was going bonkers watching this guy.

UPDTAE: I realized that most people who read this blog may not be young enough to remember Ed Grimley. So, to avoid another debacle like The Great H.R. Pufnstuf Disaster of 2007, here's the man who could well be little jeremy Fry's father:

Tuesday, February 17, 2009

Stuck In My Head: Sonic Youth



See this video? It came out around 1994, and I remember seeing it and thinking "I've got to listen to some Sonic Youth, this is pretty good." I asked my friend to lend me some Sonic Youth tapes so I could give it a whirl. She said sure. But I never got the tapes from her.

Every few months, or maybe a every year, I'd ask again "Hey, could I borrow some Sonic Youth from you?" And she'd always say "Sure," and would never follow up. It was just a thing that kept happening. We started dating, then we broke up, and became frenemies, then reconciled and became good friends for years and years. All the while, I'd ask for some Sonic Youth, and she'd agree and never follow up.

Finally last month she sent me a couple of albums, and I haven't stopped listening since. Kinda worth the 15-year wait, I think.

Thursday, February 12, 2009

Revere Journal to Youth: Drop Dead

Youth prevention program? Do they mean condom distribution in the high school? But the high school kids are also considered "youth," so maybe they want a new law requiring residents be born at age 18? Only in Revere would moms be expected to gestate their kids for 225 months. The birth certificate could double triple as selective service registration and FAFSA application.

Hey, it's not like I'm against preventing youth! It's such a hard word to say, anyway:

Wednesday, February 11, 2009

Whole Lotta love

One day, YouTube will be either gone or filled with slick, production-heavy videos. That will be a sad day, because things like this won't be around. Holy cow, this is awesome...



(h/t: Ta-Nehisi Coates)

Wednesday, February 04, 2009

Good Luck Adam!

Adam Gaffin, lord and ruler of the awesome Universal Hub, lost his day job today. Here's to hoping for a quick change in fortune. There's a grassroots effort on his site right now to create UH t-shirts. Buy one.

And let me add my voice to the chorus: The Boston Globe needs to hire Gaffin right away.

Wednesday, January 07, 2009

Walking on Ice: A Boston Globe Investigation

Thank God for the Boston Globe. If it weren't for the newspaper, I, a native-born new Englander, would have no idea how to walk around in the winter.

Remember, kids: Ice can be what physicists call "slippery." When you encounter this slippery surface, you can't run over like you're trying to steal second base! Silly person! Why would you try to do that?

Instead, you must befriend a three-foot tall penguin. He will guide you through the treacherous passes of black ice like a Sherpa guide leading climbers up Everest. It's all depicted in this Globe graphic, which was helpfully added to the incredibly important Page 1 news story:


I suspect you could find a web-footed Tenzing Norgay somewhere in the New England Aquarium but they, you know, frown on people waltzing in and making better offers to their star attractions. Best to do this at night. Leave a salary proposal tucked into the mouth of a Perch and pray to God the penguin reads the note before it gets hungry. Otherwise, stay inside until the ice thaws and the Globe tells you what to do when the big yellow fireball in the sky makes the ice go away.

If only the Aquarium still ran it's penguin-walking bootcamp from back in our youth:


Tuesday, January 06, 2009

Introducing Popcorn Brothers

So I mentioned this in passing last week, but today I have an announcement: My buddy Joe and I have started Popcorn Brothers, a blog about the movies. We plan to include a bunch of features over time, including Joe's running list of every movie he sees this year, reviews of newly released films, true tales of horror from modern movie houses, trailer reports, a couple of side projects, and perhaps even a video podcast sometime down the line (more on that another time).

We already have a few reviews up, and more are on the way. Check in as often as you like; My goal is to have new content there every day. Too lazy to type in the adress? No problem. You can also sign up for our RSS feed and have Popcorn Brothers delivered to your Google Reader, Bloglines, or whatever service you use.

It's a work in progress, but we're both excited about the prospects. Joe's busy developing a logo for the site, and we'll probably scrap the default look once that's done. The goal is to have a little fun with America's most commercial artistic endeavor. Please comment away and let us knwo what you think aboutspecific movies and anything else you'd like to talk about. We'd love to hear from you.

Monday, January 05, 2009

Stuck In My Head: The Pretenders



I've had the Pretenders playing almost non-stop the last couple of weeks. Like everyone else of a certain age, I always wanted to date Chrissie Hynde. Alas.

It's also worth noting that the band had one of the first true mega-hit videos with Brass in Pocket. It's such a fun, wistful idea of a song about a crush, and the video matches perfectly:


Friday, January 02, 2009

Back Next Week

Hey, sorry for the post outage. I've been on vacation and enjoying it. I've also been working on a new project, which I (we) will hopefully have up and running in the next few weeks. But don't abandon me; I haven't abandoned you.